Hello dear friends, how are ya? We’re sleep deprived as hell and I feel like I’m on a mix of speed and downers, but otherwise we’re doing great in our little baby cocoon! I have many Aidan updates to share but first, I want to get something out of the way. I’ve not been blogging daily. I know, bad blogger. But here’s why: I’m kinda busy with this cute little critter below. I want to eventually have something called work / life balance but I’m finding it really fun not thinking about schedules and deadlines. I’m liking this whole chillax rollin’ with whatever the day brings lifestyle. It’s not how I usually roll, that’s for sure, but it is what it is right now. Funny, after my son was born my midwife encouraged me to take the first year a bit like Alcoholics Anonymous, “One day at a time”, encouraging me to not think about tomorrow. I laughed. Me? Not think about tomorrow? Yeah, whatevs.
I’m totally strategic, big picture, a million ideas, and I don’t just have ideas, I execute on a lot of them because when I don’t, I am pretty hard on myself. She must have sensed that. Whenever she’d stop by to check on the baby, she’d remind me to take one day at a time. She told me my house was much too clean and I didn’t even look like I just had a baby and that was 10 days after I gave birth. I think she could see that I am a bit of an overachiever. (You think?!) After a few weeks, I totally GOT what she meant. I needed to chill. The baby drives the schedule – he is BOSS. So I am cruising along with him for the moment. Once I got the hang of living for today (I have never been so unscheduled in my life) I have to admit: I’m kinda loving it. Of course, we have a sleep schedule in place, I shower each morning and get prettied up (I was raised a southern girl after all), my husband and I eat at set times, but at his age in his baby life, everything else is totally unpredictable.
Having a baby made me really appreciate that some of the best moments in life are the unrehearsed bits and his birth also made me love running my company from home even more. I’m confident that I’ll always have work to do and new things to build on so I’m not worried about missing a little work time right now. I just don’t want to sit in front of my Mac all day or constantly be running off for work stuff – I want to be with my husband and the little bug as much as I can to soak it all in.
I know every mom is different and I know many don’t have the luxury of working from home as I do… So I appreciate what I have. I really wonder how moms who working full-time do it now that I have a baby. MAD PROPS to you ladies. It must be so hard. I decided to keep our baby by my side for the first few years because I want to experience his firsts with him but this is only possible because I have my own business and since I’m willing to take the pay cut. We don’t have a mortgage, it’s possible for us to live with a little less for a few months. It’s just how it has to be. When it comes to money, the more you have the more you spend on stuff you don’t need anyway, right? I also feel more creative than ever since having a baby. Challenges always make me more creative, when my life is too easy I lose my edge… Having a baby presented crazy scheduling and sleep challenges but I feel super-charged on a creative level and this is great. My health has been great otherwise but I’ve not really slept more than 5 hours straight in 3 months. Even when I’m sleeping, since his crib is nearby our bed, I am still “on” hearing his sounds and waking if he starts fussing. But yeah, I have crazy respect for women with children more than ever now.
Despite the current scheduling and sleep challenges I do feel GOOD though. I mean, I’m really happy and feel totally centered somehow even though I’m walking into doors and constantly forgetting stuff. During all of his naps I’m constantly thinking about my family life and business and where I see it in a year from now (okay so I’m not 100% taking it one day at a time, but I try). I’m making concrete decisions and I believe that being a mother is already forcing me to make some important career changes for the better. I’ll get better. And I needed that because frankly, I was getting bored and boredom (like passion) starts to show after awhile. For the past three months, my passion has returned and is only growing stronger. In fact, I’m putting together a new direction for my work life and over time, you’ll start to see my plans take action. I hope my new adventures inspire you as I go.
I have to quickly tell you something funny. It’s about a thing that is totally unrelated to career stuff. It’s what I call the mommy mafia. I have some great friends in my life who dropped in very suddenly because they too have babies and we just met and connected. I love going out with them here in my hood – coffee in one hand, babes in the other — it’s a fun new social network I’m part of and I really love it. If someone had told me that I’d say all of this a year ago, I would have laughed in their face. I always looked at these women, the baby mamas out there, as being from another planet as I watched them run around chasing their kids. Now, I’m right alongside sharing stories from the changing table, burping my son as I listen intently to their secrets and tips that cover everything from post-pregnancy vagina workouts (yes, really!) to the latest baby gadgets. These women as so cool though and it’s been super helpful to have other moms to talk to about baby stuff instead of boring my friends to tears (the ones who don’t have kids and see me now like an alien from another planet). Together with the mommy mafia as I call them, we visit cafes and farmers’ markets, go for forest walks and soon, regular swim class with the babies. I never thought I’d love being part of a mom club but I really, really do. And I’m not just friends with these women because we have children – we click on other levels too so it’s been a great new adventure in friendship for me.
By the way, our baby boy, Aidan Benjamin, turned 12 weeks old on Sunday and today, May 9th, he is officially three months old. THREE MONTHS. It feels like much longer though – seriously, it is like he’s always been here with us. He is just as darling as ever, too though he’s not a quiet super easy sleepy baby like some of my friends brag about as they tell me how perfect their kids are. Aidan is fiery, just like the meaning of his name. He has a very big personality, he is always making noise, very interactive, is already trying to tell me stores – it’s the funniest thing to have a baby so young that is so intense and “on”. I guess, in many ways, he’s just a little version of me. He never shuts up just like his mother. And I love it. But at the end of the day, I collapse. I’ll admit that. Thankfully though, he sleeps through the night so I’m getting back to a normal sleep schedule myself. I will have to thank him someday for this. I have so many mommy friends with babies much older that keep them up all night still. Someday when he comes home with everything pierced and a girlfriend who scares me, I’ll remember that AT LEAST HE SLEPT THROUGH THE NIGHT AS A BABY. I’ll be more forgiving as a result. I’ll try to like his girlfriends.
A little about Aidan so far: He loves people, loves being outside, he adores children, is always giggling when we play with him (he sounds so cute too), he enjoys having lots of kisses (yay!), enjoys dancing with us, is easily startled (just like me), loves having his photo taken (he looks right at the camera and sometimes, smiles), really likes going for walks, finally will wear his hats (he battled me until week 9), loves cuddling us and is very, very active in the morning and late afternoon but then gets sleepy in the evening and crashes. He isn’t that keen on any of his toys or books yet because his focus still is on mommy, daddy and milk. Oh and everyone who meets him falls in love.
By the way, if you care, I post photos of him on Instagram quite a lot so if you want to see please visit my IG account. It’s such a precious time for us, you guys seriously, it’s the best. I sort of wondered if I’d ever have a baby or not, I was living a bit of an eternal adolescence and time slipped away quicker and quicker once I hit thirty, so the fact that I had him later in life makes him so much more amazing to me. So yeah, I’m not blogging full-time right now but don’t worry, I’ve got plans up my sleeve… And you’ll still find decor8 an inspirational space – in fact, even more. OK whew! Enough! So that’s my little update for now. I’ll post another when he turns 6 months, okay?
Love, Holly xo