Divorce Design - Making Your Space Feel Like Home Again

Let’s talk about divorce and design, because I really feel like this needs to be its own topic within the world of interiors and it’s just not. Countless people have endured the end of a live-in relationship (married or not), so a clear, straightforward design topic like this has the potential to make a serious, much-needed impact. Divorce Design could be its own book - and bring the kind of empowering, high-five, fist-bump energy one needs to navigate such a challenging time. We often address newlyweds, house flipping, staging for a sale, empty nester’s, dorm design and nursery decor, all associated with new beginnings, but what about divorce? How does that impact the way your home looks and feels? How does this impact the design?

Divorce happens to 60% of us but when it comes to design mags, books, and streaming series about design, you rarely see fabulous newly single moms (or dads) giving us a home tour after they lost the big house or had to relocate to a new city. Even if they kept the same house, how do you reclaim the space?

How do you move out, move on, or stay in the “family home” and give it that clean slate energy that you need to move forward?

My friend in New Jersey went through a divorce in 2023 and was at a complete loss. She had to move out, but didn’t know how to use a drill, hang curtain rods, or even choose a dishwasher. She wondered if she still needed two nightstands now that she’s single. She was so overwhelmed—barely managing her day job, let alone her new home life as she sat around a room of boxes needing to be unpacked. That’s where I came in. I gave her a floor plan, mood board, advice on color and style, and links to products and services in her state. Within a few months, she was set up and her interior world felt like a safe, cozy haven. Most importantly, it was her haven - and she felt good in the space.

I’m not here to sugarcoat divorce with optimistic design advice, but it’s important to call divorce out for what it really is: It’s hard, it’s not easy to move on, but it’s entirely possibly to allow design to help you move forward and heal

I believe a new chapter in your life like divorce can be your big chance to reclaim your space, make it truly your own, and set the stage for a fresh, new life to play out. Your home (in this moment) may feel loaded with memories, but you can re-frame it as simply a blank canvas in which you can paint a new life. I’m not saying to totally erase the past—it’s about re-framing things and letting go of what hurts and imagine creating a home that reflects the new you or even the you that you wish to be.

How do you want this new chapter of your life to feel?

I always advise my newly divorced clients to start by removing whatever holds negative energy or serves as a reminder of the relationship that’s ended - furniture, decor, or even the layout or room arrangement. Letting go allows you to breathe easier. Some of my clients turn the home office into the bedroom and the former bedroom into the home office, or move all the furniture around, buy a new mattress, or even paint pieces of furniture to make it feel different and more fresh.This process can be emotional, yes, but think of it more in a positive way - as a cathartic release. You’re not just redecorating; you’re rebuilding your sense of self. Invite a friend over if you wish, play your favorite music, and transform your space. Focus on creating a home that mirrors your vision. Keep what matters - and let go of the rest.

De-cluttering and letting go of stuff not only gives you more physical space but also clears out mental clutter.

If you’re unsure about certain items, pack them away temporarily and revisit them later. As you begin to shape your new home, you’ll find that some things naturally feel out of place anyway, and that you don’t even WANT them in the room anymore - they feel dated or done.

The idea of redecorating an entire home can be overwhelming so you may opt to start small. Pick one room or even a single corner to focus on. A bedroom makeover or updating your living room can bring new energy into your space.

One thing a lot of newly divorced friends tell me is that, after spending years compromising on style choices with their husband, now they can do whatever they wish - and they love it. Try experimenting with design ideas you’ve admired but never had the chance to explore. The beauty of this hard moment is that you have total creative freedom, so allow yourself to have fun with it and to let it distract you in a healthy way.

Redecorating can be more than an aesthetic transformation— it’s healing. As you rethink your space, consider designing areas of your home that promote healing and relaxation. Maybe it’s a yoga nook where you can spend time each day, a meditation corner for mindfulness, or a bathroom that feels like a spa retreat because you make it truly YOU. Think about what activities bring you peace and joy, then design your home to support those moments.

Adding soft textures, calming colors, and personal touches can make your home a safe haven where you can heal, recharge, and grow. Some of the simplest and most effective ways to invite fresh energy into your home is by adding fresh flowers, plants, giving the space a deep clean, and by maximizing natural light. Plants and indoor trees (like a ficus fig) are known for their ability to boost mood and purify the air, and they can brighten any space. Whether it’s a few succulents on a shelf or a large leafy plant in a sunny corner, greenery adds a sense of renewal and growth. Plants also give you something to take care of, to tend to, and this can feel deeply rewarding during a time of loss or sorrow. It can be encouraging to witness their growth, as it’s also a reminder of how you’re also going to grow with time and gentle care.

Give your home a deep clean, open the windows for some fresh air, and draw back the curtains to allow in as much natural light as possible. You may want to remove heavy curtains altogether and opt for something lighter. Sunlight has a way of instantly making a home feel more alive, and it’s a great way to elevate your mood on those harder days.

Cook, bake, add scented oils or candles, and change the smell of your home - this is also a big enhancement to home life after your marriage ends. And don’t forget the power of music too. Create new playlists that empower and strengthen your soul and outlook. I love Spotify!

Own your space -make it truly yours so you can heal and move on.

It’s time to honor your personal tastes, your new direction in life, and what you need to feel at peace. Maybe you haven’t lived alone in many years, perhaps you’ve never lived alone - this is a chance to revisit the years of your youth when you had tremendous freedom. You have it back but with all that wisdom and experience layered on top. Whether you prefer a minimalist aesthetic or want to go all out with bold patterns and textures, the key is to make choices that speak to you and that help you to see this as a growth stage, a new path.

You deserve a space that uplifts you, comforts you, and makes you excited to walk through the door every day. Remember: your home is your very own little sanctuary now, it should make you feel hopeful, not hopeless, and it should be a place where you feel nothing but peace, joy, safety, and endless possibility.

Wishing you love and peace in your new space.

Holly

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